


Little Light

by mickeysbrows



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Daddy!Ian, Daddy!Mickey, M/M, Parent!Ian and Mickey, Surrogacy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-29
Updated: 2017-07-29
Packaged: 2018-12-08 07:52:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,442
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11642187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mickeysbrows/pseuds/mickeysbrows
Summary: Mickey and Ian want to have another baby, and turn to a surrogate for help.this was a birthday present written for me by jessica aka @bellsgalaxy on twitter so pls tweet her and tell her how wonderful it is





	Little Light

It’s been about a month since their wedding when Ian first brings it up, and Mickey nearly chokes on his steak.

Sure, they’ve talked about having kids before. They both grew up in semi-large families, but Ian had three younger siblings while Mickey was too young to remember anything about Mandy as a baby. And sure, he has Yevgeny, but didn’t go to Svetlana’s ultrasound appointments or hold her hand through contractions. He only changed the little sucker’s diapers a handful of times before his mom took him and moved in with some guy she met at the Alibis.

Mickey didn’t choose any of that, but he still feels like he failed Yevgeny in a way. He just wants to be a good dad, no, a perfect dad. He doesn’t want do disappoint another child.

Though it doesn’t provide much light, the bulb hanging above the dinner table dimly illuminates Ian’s worried expression, and Mickey clears his throat.

“You’re going to be such a good dad” he smiles.

Ian still looks worried though.

“You are too, Mick. We don’t have to do this now, you know, whenever you’re ready”

“A’course I’m fucking ready” Mickey snaps, and then sighs when he sees Ian frowning across from him. He grabs his husband’s hands in his own and smiles.

“So how the fuck we doin’ this?”

——————————————————————————-

It turns out that surrogates are really fucking expensive.

They drive to the office on the first day Ian can get off from work. It’s the middle of April, and it’s the first sunny day Chicago has had in weeks.

The woman there is nice enough, greeting them at the door and leading them back to her tiny, cramped office, sitting down behind her desk with an overworked sigh. She goes through what seems to be her usual shpiel, telling them that typical fees are anywhere from $90,00 to $150,00 to cover all medical expenses. She then tells them that they can look through files on hand and select potential surrogates to meet up with.

“We have several fine young women to choose from” she rattles off, searching her cluttered desk for folders.

Mickey rolls his eyes at her and Ian elbows him in the ribs.

She explains to them that they’ll look through the files on hand and try to find a “perfect match”—somebody who ideally wants to be implanted with the amount of embryos they want placed, which in this case is one. They’ll meet with any potential surrogates they like, talk about how they both want things to go, and then start the process of creating the embryo to be implanted.

She gives them ten folders, and tells them to be picky.

“Take them home, look over them, and try to find the person that you feel absolutely matches your needs…okay boys?” she smiles at them, a little too enthusiastically.

Mickey is still hesitant about this. They could just take some kid from the foster care system, one who’ll probably resemble him when he was younger, really cute and in need of a fuckin’ bath, and that’ll cost a hell of a lot less than this fancy pants bullshit. Sure, they wouldn’t necessarily get to call the booger theirs, but maybe they’d get sick of the little shit just in time for it to be placed in its forever home or whatever. Yeah, he wants to be a dad with Ian. But if they’re going to get stared at and talked through everything like five year olds in a kindergarten classroom, he’s not sure if he can do it.

They go home, and Ian can immediately tell something is up.

“Mick, are you okay? You didn’t say a word on the drive home”.

“Mmm” he hums. “Was just tired, ya know?”

“Sure” Ian replies. “Wanna look through the folders” he holds the stack of them up and smiles. Mickey can see how happy he is already.

“Don’t know, might take a nap” he lies.

Ian puts up a fight though. He reminds him that the quicker they choose surrogates to meet up, the sooner they can get the ball rolling. Mickey finally agrees when he looks up at Ian and sees his eyes practically gleaming.

Of the ten files, they can only agree on one woman who looks normal. Mickey whines that he doesn’t want some suburban housewife who lives on the north side and has two kids already and is doing this out of some charitable self-righteousness. But one is a grad student trying to pay off her debt and notes in her file that working as a therapist isn’t going to cut it, and they both decide she’s perfect.

———————————————————————————————————–

They meet her the following weekend at a pub downtown.

Her name is Kristen, and she has blonde hair and freckles dotting her cheeks just like Ian’s. She’s funny and charming, really charming. But Mickey is still skeptical. They ask her about some of the things she included in in her file—what her family’s like, how her brand new job as a therapist is going, and how much debt she has to pay off.

“So how does this work?” Mickey finally asks. “Like, does one of us have to fuck you or some shit?”

“Uh, no” she laughs. “One of you provides your sperm and then they implant it in my uterus until one of them knocks me up”. 

Mickey nods, pondering.

“So then it’s basically your kid too?”

“Hell no” she retorts. “I fucking hate kids”.

Ian laughs, nearly spilling his beer on himself and looks at her.

“Then why are you fucking carrying one?”

“Money. I put that in my fucking file”.

“Yeah I know, just making sure”. 

They meet again when Ian and Mickey have gathered the proper paperwork from the agency so that the three of them can sign them.

“Wait” Mickey stops Kristen as she’s about to sign her uterus away on the document in front of her.

“You’re gonna be fuckin’ careful, right? No drinking or smoking or fuckin’ dudes with big johnsons, got it?”

She chuckles. “I have a girlfriend don’t worry”.

“Well then no big fuckin’ dildos then, jesus” he scoffs, shaking his head.

Kristen thinks about telling him that no dick is going to be big enough to dent the baby’s head, but refrains. Instead, she signs the form that is going to turn the next nine months of her life into a living breathing, beluga whale-cosplaying hell, and tells them she’ll see them at the doctor’s office on Monday.

——————————————————————————————–

The first doctor’s appointment is weird, which is an understatement.

Ian has to jerk off, which he does on a regular basis anyways, but this time he has to make sure he ejaculates into the plastic cup they’ve provided him. They’ve graciously provided porno magazines, none of which are gay, so he clears his throat, undresses himself, and squeezes his eyes shut. He tries to fantasize about, but without porn it’s a figurative, not literal bust.

He gives up on using his imagination and pulls out his phone, turning to Pornhub on mute as his new best friend. They’ve promised him that the walls of the room are soundproof, but he doesn’t trust that a doctor won’t walk by mid-stroke and judge him on his video preference.

After a few minutes, he manages to cum into the cup and awkwardly pulls his pants back up before bringing his specimen back to the examination room where Mickey and Kristen are talking with the fertility specialist.

Mickey looks at him apologetically, as if to say “sorry I couldn’t help” and Ian can’t help but to smirk at him.

“How’s everything going? Is her uterus up to par doc?”

The doctor, a woman in her mid-30’s with dark hair and a meek smile assures him that everything looks perfect to go ahead.

The sperm is promptly implanted into Kristen, who shudders and complains about how disgusting cum is, and thus it begins. New life starts to form. It feels far more medical than intimate, but Ian and Mickey are excited nonetheless.

——————————————————————————————-

Over the next few weeks, Kristen is monitored to see if/how the embryo is forming. The doctor jokes that Ian’s sperm were dying to get inside of a vagina, because one manages to knock her up on the first try.

They almost can’t believe it—they’re going to be parents. Ian cries when he hears it, and he’s dancing around the apartment for five minutes before Mickey can even catch him to kiss him.

“Mm, I love you” Ian whispers.

“I love you too, fucker”

———————————————————————————————–

The next few months go quickly, with Ian picking up extra shifts at work and Mickey coming up with colorful new schemes every now and then to afford the bills that keep piling up. He manages to get to the word out to half the south side that he’s the best new house painter in town, and provides his services cheap. He jacks a van Iggy stole from some dude on the east side who went on vacation, paints people’s houses, asks to use their bathroom, and snatches up any artwork he finds lying around. Then, he sells them to yuppity fucks across town for way more than they’re worth.

Sometimes, Kristen will invite them to her doctor’s appointments so they can see the baby growing. They usually go out for lunch after, with mostly consists of listening to her complain about how awful it is growing a demon the size of a watermelon in your stomach, and how all she’s been craving is the spinach enchilada from her favorite restaurant back in her home town, ten hours away.

It’s nice to see her though.

They can visibly see their child growing, and even though it definitely just looks like a mutant, Ian swears he can see parts of himself in the little thing’s face.

At night, Ian excitedly talks about how pretty soon, they won’t be getting any sleep. Mickey always stares at him for a moment, dumbfounded at how he can possibly be looking forward to that, but kisses him goodnight anyways and tells him he can’t wait either. Then he turns around, Ian pulls him closer, and peppers kisses across his shoulders.

——————————————————————————————-

Everything is going well, and the baby is healthy. The technician asks if they want to know the sex, and while they’re both curious, they agree it’ll be better to be surprised.

The next appointment, they bring Yevgeny. They figure that now the baby is big enough to look like an actual person, and not an alien, and it might make more sense to the child. Even still though, Yev, being a typical eight year old, has a million questions when they get back into the car.

“Is that lady gonna steal the baby?”

“No, she’s just carrying it for us! It’s our baby, bud”.

“Oh. So you guys made it?”

“Yes”.

“So, how did you guys make a baby? Did you have to poop it out and put it in that lady?”

“No! Jesus fucking Christ” Mickey rubs his temple. “They took Ian’s magic fuckin’ seed and put it in the surrogate, okay bud?”

He ponders for a moment, and then decides—

 

“Yeah. Guess that makes sense. Nobody wants a poopy baby”.

He laughs hysterically at himself, and at first Mickey just shakes his head. But then he can’t help but realize that this little shit is exactly like him when he was eight, and he smiles. He loves his son, and he can’t wait to be a dad again—this time with the love of his life. Ian is going to be the best dad, he thinks to himself, and his smile grows even bigger.

——————————————————————————————

It’s 3:22 in the morning when they get the call.

Ian is confused at first, in a sleepy daze. Her due date isn’t for another three weeks. Then suddenly he realizes.

Something is wrong.

Kristen’s girlfriend is on the phone, telling Ian frantically that she started bleeding a lot. She urges them to meet them at the hospital.

Ian shakes Mickey awake in a panic, tears streaming down his face. “The baby” he sobs, and Mickey holds him for a moment, blinking the sleep out of his eyes until Ian can tell him what’s going on.

They throw random garments on, and rush out the door. Mickey doesn’t even realize he’s put on slippers instead of shoes, but there’s no time to go back and change them. They race to the hospital, their hearts in their throats, and they’re wordless the whole time.

Chicago is quiet too at this time of night, and the lack of cars makes Mickey feel like he’s in some fucked up dream.

By the time they reach the reception desk in the lobby of the north side hospital, Kristen is already there, being wheeled away to a room. Her girlfriend greets them, her eyes wet, and she tells them that the doctors won’t allow any of them to be with her.

Ian curses under his breath.

“That’s my fucking child!” he yells, closing both of his hands into fists at his sides. Mickey wants to calm him down, he really does, but he’s pissed too.

“So what, she’s just supposed to fucking do this alone?” he cries, grabbing at his hair.

Her girlfriend stands there, still quietly letting the tears roll down her cheeks, powerless.

A nurse tells them to sit down in the waiting room and brings them each a tiny cup of water and a box of tissues to share. They can tell she means well, and she gives them an apologetic smile before disappearing down the corridor.

And so they wait, for what seems like hours. They read shitty health magazines and half-listen to the news playing on the tiny TV in the corner, and it isn’t long before the bright white lights start to give Ian a headache. He gets up and begins to pace, mumbling to himself.

Mickey can tell he’s out of sorts, and eventually stands up and grabs his shoulders.

“Babe, BABE” he tries, but Ian just falls apart in his arms.

“We’re losing our baby” he sobs. “That’s our baby, Mickey! I just want to know it’s okay” he shoves his face in Mickey’s shoulder.

Mickey just holds him for a while, shushing and cooing, until Ian’s shaky breath steadies.

“It’s all going to be okay baby” he promises, even though he’s worried sick himself. “I bet the doctor will come out soon and tell us everything’s alright, we’ll just go back home and in three more weeks, we’ll have our little fuckin’ cherub, right?”

Ian laughs and forces a nod. “Yeah”.

Just then, a doctor appears in the waiting room.

“I’m looking for Kristen McLeod’s friends” he scans the room.

Mickey Ian, and her girlfriend greet him.

“Is she okay?!” her girlfriend nearly shouts.

“Yes” the doctor smiles. “Now you two” he looks to Mickey and Ian. “Would you like to meet your son?”

—————————————————————————————-

He’s tiny, four pounds and seven ounces to be exact.

But he’s perfect.

He’s premature, so the doctor’s move him to the prenatal care unit, where they say he’ll need to stay for a few days until he’ll be strong enough to go home.

They also tell them that if Kristen had come in ten minutes later, he wouldn’t have made it.

She’s okay though, sans the fact that she can’t stop crying and apologizing to Ian and Mickey, but they laugh every time.

“It’s seriously not your fault” Ian promises. “Thank you so, so much” and now he’s crying.

Mickey is immediately extremely protective. They all move to the pediatrics wing to be with the baby, and he refuses to leave the incubator’s side. Even when Yevgeny and Mandy and his brothers come to visit, he constantly reminds them to be careful when poking at him through the little holes in the side.

Ian and Mickey spend the next few days mostly napping in the uncomfortable chairs at the hospital, and staring at their precious, perfect son. They juggle around names to pass the time, though it takes them a while to agree on one.

They call him Luka. “Light”.

———————————————————————————————

The first year goes far too fast. Ian is right, they don’t sleep a wink for the first four months. Luka constantly cries and shits and throws up, and suddenly Mickey doesn’t remember any of this happening with Yevgeny. Luka is, what he likes to call, “a little shit”, but he loves him, along with Yev, more than anything.

He’s a perfectly healthy baby, and even though Mickey knows this, he still cautions anyone who goes to hold him, and watches them like a hawk until they feel uncomfortable and hand him back.

Of course he trusts Ian though. Just like he predicted, Ian is the best dad in the world—better than him sometimes, which pisses him off. Like when it’s three in the morning and Luka is screaming at the top of his lungs, Ian always manages to get him fast asleep again in record time.

Mickey asks him how he does it finally, and Ian’s answer is simple.

“I sing to him”.

The following night, when he stirs, Ian is up and in the nursery in a matter of seconds, like usual. Mickey follows him though, and hides out of sight of the doorway to watch him. And sure enough, he’s cradling Luka, singing some nonsense song about puppies and flowers, and the kid is conked in moments. He’s not sure when he started crying, but he sniffles as quietly as possible, and tiptoes back to bed.

Luka, not only is a little shit, but a spoiled little shit as well. His aunts and uncles on both sides love him to pieces. Kristen has been inducted into the Gallagher hall of fame as an honorary aunt, and she’s always at family gatherings with her girlfriend by her side. They constantly shower Luka with presents—mostly cute baby clothes they claim they couldn’t not buy, so Luka is instantly the most stylish baby around.

Lip, unsurprisingly, is the best uncle ever. He loves having a nephew, and promises he’ll teach him to binge drink by the time he’s 21.

Debbie is thrilled that Frankie has a little cousin, and attacks him with kisses every time she seems him—much to Mickey’s dismay.

Even Fiona loves the little guy, though she promises if they ever drop him on her door step, she’ll hunt both of them down and kill them.

He’s hard not to love, he really is. He has the goofiest, toothless smile—he smiles more than any other baby they’ve ever seen. And though he cries at night, he barely ever cries during the day. On weekends, Ian and Mickey will take him to the park and point out all the birds to him. He’ll giggle and stare up at them in awe. As he gets older, he babbles at them, trying to repeat the names of each one when Mickey says them, taking his son’s hand to point at them. They bring Yevgeny too, and he loves hanging out with his little brother far more than Mickey expected. They can lay on the grass for hours, Yev fake-wrestling him and trying to get him to say his name. Mickey realizes especially in these moments, that he has the perfect family.

———————————————————————————————————–

When Luka turns one, they throw a party for him in the apartment.

Everyone cramps into their tiny dining room, watching in amusement as Luka smears cake all over his freckled face. He really does look so much like Ian now, several red hairs sprouting from the top of his head. He even acts like Ian, his ridiculous sense of humor apparent as he laughs at Yvgeny pretending to smash his face in his piece of cake.

He does have Kristen’s eyes, brown and warm, but that isn’t a bad thing.

She’s a part of their family now, no matter how strange the circumstances. Besides Mandy and Fiona, she’s his favorite aunt, and the one Mickey and Ian will forever be the most grateful to.

She’s given them their little light.

She’s given them the reason why Ian wakes up early in the morning and makes tiny pancakes.

She’s given them the reason why Mickey refuses to go out on a Friday night anymore—because he’d rather spend it inside with his boy.

She’s given them the reason why Mickey and Ian are more in love with each other than they’ve ever been.

They are forever thankful.

Because they are complete.


End file.
